Insulation

This weekend, I was watching my kids play with the bouncy horse that I enjoyed as a toddler.  It was fantastic, they had so much fun, got a little excercise, and were all smiles... even through taking turns, there was little discord.  Hubby mentioned a brilliant idea to my cousin about how making bouncy horses like this and selling them would be a money making proposition. 

Then the list began.  Our bouncey horse was red, which means it probably has lead paint having been made in the 60s or 70s.  And then, there's the real hazard of pinching a finger in the springs.  Or worse yet, another child might walk in front and get hit with the horses mouth.  The government has created laws that prohibit people from selling toys like that.  You can't make and sell new ones, and we couldn't legally sell this one at a yard sale without risking the US government deciding that we've broken a federal law. 

Children of the 21st Century are insulated from the natural consequences of their actions.

Remember studying for the SATs, and you needed to understand analogies?  In our lives, we can learn lessons used in one situation, and apply them to situations we encounter in others.  Natural consequences allow humans to develop reasoning and logic skills (common sense, anyone?). 

With the horsey, 5 children played uneventfully for several hours.  No one licked the horse.  No one stuck their fingers in the springs and got pinched.  No one got hit when walking past too close to the horse.  My family all kind of sat back and let the kids play, isn't that what kids are supposed to do after all?

Based on this experience, and similar previous ones, I trust my kids.  I trust that if their friends are jumping on a trampoline, my kids will be smart enough not to grab the springs.  I trust that if they walk by some kids swinging, that they'll allow a wide enough berth not to get kicked in the head.  I trust my older one to avoid licking lead paint, and supervise the younger one, sometimes from a distance, to ensure that she remains trustworthy as I develop that trust in her.

I often hear about 2 schools of thought.  One is that if we grew up doing it, and it didn't hurt us, it was good enough for us, it's good enough for our kids.  Then I hear about how when we know better, we do better.  I see merit in both arguements.   I don't want to be casting my 6 year olds arm, or 3 year old's leg.  I don't want to see my kids get hurt.  What I DO want is for my kids to develop the ability to make good choices on their own without me questioning every choice they make.  I want them to be confident in their physical abilities, but realistic about their skills as well.  If that means that they misjudge a distance at the playground and fall, I might be taking a trip to the ER... When you fall, you get hurt... that's a natural consequence, and kids need to learn it. 

As we were packing up to leave our little get together, our bigger one was playing on an excercise ball.  His dad was right there, within arms reach, when he lost his sense of direction for a moment somehow.  He crashed to the floor, landing, of course, on his head.  The goose egg formed immediately, and tears ensued.  A little ice applied.  The injury of the day came, not from playing with the outlawed toy, but from enjoying a "safe" inflatable ball.